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Archive for the ‘Box Sitting’ Category

A few months ago, an announcement was made regarding the addition of palace staff. This arrangement has worked out extremely well for all concerned. Buddy is especially glad to have another source of adoration, and Bear is pleased that an additional can opener is now available. This week, however, the new staff member has added skills to his resume. Upon emptying a rather large box that had contained a shipment of kitchen supplies, he turned the box on its side and set it on the floor so that Buddy could play Cat Fort whenever he wants. With his recovery complete and the return of warmer weather, Buddy has spent many happy hours holding down the fort. And as a side benefit, naps are even better in the safety of a cardboard haven.

Last night when thunderstorms started to rumble, the caretaker lined the box with a comfy blanket so that the fort would be a comfortable refuge for anyone who might be frightened. Buddy insisted that he was not afraid, but he also felt it would be a shame to waste such an inviting bed, so he spent several secluded hours while the storm raged. Then tonight, when storms threatened again, the caretaker decided it was time to produce the fabric mice she had been hiding and use them to distract the jittery king, who jumped a bit higher into the air each time the thunder roared.

The first fabric mouse was received in the hallway and promptly found its way under a closed bedroom door. Buddy immediately flopped onto his side and repeatedly shoved his paws into the crack under the door, but was never able to retrieve the mouse. The second mouse did not get away so quickly. Rather than play with it in the hallway and risk a repeat of his previous tragedy, Buddy brought the mouse out into the living room and set it behind one of the box top flaps. He then proceeded to stalk it with all the gusto of an NRA member hunting a deer. Biding his time and pouncing quickly enabled him to sneak up on it, subdue it, and gather it gently into his mouth. He then approached the box and dropped the mouse on the lid that was serving as the fort’s front door.

Now if anyone in the world has his priorities straight, it is a cat. Naps are all well and good, but when a dainty blanket gets in the way of stalking wild game, something has to give. The blanket was unceremoniously shoved out of the very same box where it had served as a mattress only fifteen minutes earlier.

Fort Cat

Fort raided, mouse held for questioning

The temporary calm captured in the illustration above was shattered soon after the photo was snapped. The box began to shake, rattle, and roll while Buddy and the fabric mouse fought a duel to the imaginary death. To borrow an overused and virtually meaningless media phrase, “details are sketchy” regarding the exact nature of the battle, but thankfully Buddy won the day. He emerged from the box bearing his prize between his teeth, sauntered to the food bowl, and plopped the vanquished foe into the bowl.

Buddy’s motto is “Eat or be eaten.” Bear’s motto is quite similar, but more succinct: “Eat.”

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Two Boxen of Catsen

Our gentle readers who have kept abreast of the adventures of Buddy and Bear will remember that the cats live in a home where fun is not only allowed but encouraged. Normal people discard boxes after their shipment has been emptied and put away. Unhampered by normality, the caretaker places boxes in strategic places around the house so that the cats can hide out or lurk or pretend to be guarding a strategic outpost in the never-ending battle between the beautiful land of Felintia and the evil empire of Healthfoodious.

At present, there are two boxes in the living room. One of them is a mundane 4-sided box that once held the fire logs Buddy enjoys watching. The other box, however, is anything but mundane. No, it is a miracle of modern packaging: it has two compartments, a sort of duplex box (duplox?), as it were. Now if you’re thinking that the cats have been willing to inhabit either side of the duplox together in peace and harmony, you have either deceived yourself or you haven’t been paying attention to the previous 93 posts on this blog. Peace and harmony are often in short supply at the Seafoam Cottage. Most of the time the caretaker would be grateful for an uneasy détente instead of constant conflict.

This evening, for example, Buddy gulped down his dinner and then took up residence in the duplox, daring Bear to approach his fort, which he had claimed in the name of cod and country. Unruffled, Bear sidled into the normal box, which is stationed across the room from the duplox. The staring contest that ensued was epic. Briefly epic, that is. Buddy has a short attention span and a wicked desire to take whatever Bear has, so he soon became bored and decided to oust Bear from her box, though it is obviously inferior to his own. (Cats’ decisions do not have to make sense, as human logic goes. It is a pity that humans can be entirely too logical sometimes. It is that failing which keeps them from being truly great.)

When Buddy abandoned his post, Bear took the opportunity to dart by him and claim the duplox for her own. Looking a bit confused, Buddy rushed into the inferior box as though playing a demented game of musical chairs, without the chairs or the music. Again quickly bored, he charged back to regain his position in Fort Duplox, while Bear sought higher ground, specifically the area of the couch just east of the caretaker.

With détente restored, Buddy decided the duplox was boring, so he took up his other post in the window sill, just west of the caretaker. He may not be able to pursue his plot against Bear, now that she has sought sanctuary, but he can jolly well take out his aggressions against any foe that happens to walk by. So beware, all nocturnal creatures—opossums, blossoms, or students with drums; rats, bats, or other cats; raccoons, baboons, or Broadway show tunes—anyone who makes the mistake of wandering past the Seafoam Cottage this night. Beware, take care, and prepare to be looked at very sternly.

It will serve you right.

(Note 1: There would have been photos, but the dramatic events described above took place entirely in the dark.)

(Note 2: The intended next entry was preempted by the dramatic events described above. Barring any other breaking news, our gentle readers will next be regaled by the story of the traveling plant. That is not a typo.)

(Note 3: There is no Note 3.)

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